Moving on

This morning, I got a reply from Jane. It doesn't seem that she will change her mind. I guess that's OK. It makes me sad, of course. I just wish I had done more. that is, done more a few months ago. I was in Russia for two years and I thought that she wouldn't really date seriously. I was a fool for thinking that way. I thought that she would come closer to where I live in January and she still might. but I don't know for sure. Why did I have to be so shy? Oh, well. There are plenty of wonderful women in this world and quite a few live close to me. Just another learning experience for me.

Hello to anyone who looks at me

Well, I have finally sunk to the level of posting my feelings on the internet for all to see. I really don't know what to write but, here it goes. . .

Today I found out that the girl that I thought would be the "one" just got engaged. It must have happened yesterday because she had emailed me on Monday. And from that email, to me at least, it seemed she didn't have much news. I mostly feel regret for not really persueing her. I'm not angry or anything, just dissappointed.

Unlike most people my age, I have yet to have an offical girlfriend. This girl, her name is Jane*, was probably the closest I have gotten. She is a great girl, Jane seems to be more mature than her peers and she is also Beautiful. I have known her for years but, I never thought of her as being a potential "date" because of the age difference (about four years). I love her family and they don't seem to mind me either. She is down to earth and knows how to work for what she has.

I sent her an email to let her know my feelings, at least some of them. I don't know what she will write back. It is a scary thing to share one's feelings with another person.

_
* her name is not really Jane.